Rough Seas Ahead
Caring Bridge - June 24, 2019:
As of this week, we’re about halfway through our time here in Memphis. We’re thankful for all the ways God has provided for us while we’ve been here, from housing to quality time with family.
The ride has been a little bumpy for the last few days. Asher threw up a few times on Saturday and was not able to sleep. Sunday was tough—his low energy level, headache, and the persistent dizziness contributed to a general feeling of crummy. Then, this (Monday) morning he threw up while he was at one of his clinical visits. Like a lot of symptoms, they aren’t consistent enough to point to one thing in particular, but the compounding effect of managing nausea along side the bevy of other symptoms he’s currently enduring at various levels (dizziness, insomnia, reflux, etc.) are a lot for the little guy to handle. Nevertheless, he’s been a champ in handling it with a good attitude, even though it can be overwhelming at times. We couldn’t be more proud of him. Pray that he continues to remain strong.
We are also reminded of how thankful we are for the many resources St. Jude provides for families. The cascade of issues that come with a brain tumor are best treated by specialists, and St. Jude has an army of them, both on and off site. This week alone, he’s seeing a neurologist, pulmonologist, optometrist, otolaryngologist, physical and occupational therapists, and so on. So please pray that these doctors and therapists would be able to help us stamp out a few of these lingering problems.
Please continue to pray for Leah and I; for faith on the dark days, strength to bear the burden of each day, wisdom in decisions that would give God glory, and joy within suffering.
This was (again) not going the direction we had hoped. He was getting sicker, despite us doing everything we possibly could, and it was deflating. But the reality was that were as depending on God’s help as we had always been.
Here is a space where I can clearly answer the question of how God answered prayers for our hearts during that season. We had taken so many blows, not only in his diagnosis, but in unmet expectations (e.g. attempting to increase his quality of life). And I’m wired in such a way that, after enough hits, I’m really ready to just lay down and quit, because… why try? And this is a space where God’s power would be manifest. We were given the grace, the strength, and the means to get up and get after it each and every day. It’s was a fortitude that I’ve never experienced before, and I’m absolutely certain it wasn’t something I psyched myself up to. It was a fresh batch of grace and mercy each morning; strength for the day; no more, and no less.
Thanks be to God.